Atonement is not a word we use much in America, especially today. Yet, with what is going on in our country and around the world we sure do need more work on it, more thinking about it, and more doing something about what we need to atone for. I don’t think we can atone for the “sins of our fathers” as they say, but we can atone for our own negative thoughts, words, deeds, and behaviors.
Atonement has been defined in many ways such as reparation for a wrong doing or making amends for your actions, words, and/or deeds. Or even read as “at one meant.” In, Buddhism we have a gatha or chant that we recite at the end of our sitting period. It is simple yet powerful.
All harmful karma ever committed by me since of old
On account of my beginingless greed, anger, and ignorance,
Born of my body, mouth, and thought,
Now I atone for it all…
Kaz Tanahashi in his book Zen Chants reminds us that “We are in the midst of changeable and unchangeable karma in each moment. We are bound by cause and effect, but at the same time we are partly free of cause and effect. This is the case during meditation, when we can be completely free from the chain of causation. At this time, we can be anybody and anywhere. We are what we meditate. We are also the source of cause and effect (page 146).[1]
Each time I recite this chant I feel like I’ve been given a new life, and a new opportunity to get something right! To have a “do over” as we might say today. I may not be able to have a “do over” with someone who has passed away or no longer will take my calls, texts, or emails, but atone I must—to forgive myself for my behavior or words or deeds that harmed or hurt another. Regardless of whether the person is someone you know or a total stranger if we have harmed then atonement is the best action to take. If we decide not to take that action it doesn’t mean that we’re done with it anyway!
I once worked with a congregant of mine who had a very bad relationship with his brother. Upon his brother’s untimely death, he went into a great depression for how he had left their relationship. It came to me when we were together one day for him to simply meditate on the love that he had held back from his brother and ask an imaginary angel to deliver him a message of repentance, love, and compassion. Not long after he said that his brother had come to him in a dream and they hugged and forgave each other, and his pain and suffering was relieved. His love for his brother was evident in his countenance he was smiling joyfully.
He was freed from the chain of causation through atonement! How chained are you? What will you do about it? Will you atone and be released from those thoughts and emotions? Or do you choose to live with the pain, anger, and animosity? The choice is yours—which will it be.
[1]Tanahashi, K. (2015) Zen Chants Thirty-Five Essential Texts with Commentary. Shambhala: Boston and London
The Secret to a More Fulfilling Life: Part 10 The Practice of Letting Go
Posted in attachment, BUddhism, cause and effect, clinging, fears, happiness, illusions, love, meditation, Mindfulness, self-help, suffering, Uncategorized, wisdom, Zen, tagged Buddhism, dualism, faith, feelings, inspiration, Kazuaki Tanahashi, learning, letting go, life, questions, relationships, thoughts, Truth, Zen Chants Thirty-Five Essential Texts with Commentary on July 22, 2018| Leave a Comment »
I love this quote by Kazuaki Tanahashi from his beautiful book Zen Chants. It brought to mind what often happens when I sit down to meditate. Up come all the nodes and knots that I’ve experienced throughout the day or the week. I focus on how hard they were to surmount or maneuver around. When I catch these thoughts arising I think to myself, I need to let this go. It is disrupting my meditation! And thus, the simple thought of letting go is now the catalyst for more thinking, self-recrimination, and more.
Round and round on the merry-go-round I go until my head is spinning and I’ve made myself dizzy. So how do I “pass through the barrier of dualism?” How about becoming one with the barrier? One with the thought, feeling, or idea. To give it the freedom to be, to go, to sustain, or disappear without judgment, fear, or insistence.
To breath into it slowly, lovingly, and kindly. We are so quick to provide loving kindness to a friend or family member in need. To hold back recrimination or judgment. To give them space to find themselves to live their life as they need to. To respect their boundaries, dreams, and desires. Yet, how often do we not give ourselves the space, advice, room, or love?
How often do we give ourselves permission to let go, to make mistakes, to get up in the middle of a sit when we have a cramp in our leg? I recall some time ago when I was sitting in dokusan with one of my favorite teachers, Lou Mitsunen Nordstrom, and I told him I was going to start my own zendo and name it “If it itches, Scratch it.” I may go to the fictious “Zen Hell” for that idea. Luckily the only hell I have is between my own ears! And for sure I need to “let go” of that idea!
Wow! Maybe I should start my new adventure by letting go of the idea that hell is between my own ears! What a great ending for my workbook on The Secret to a More Fulfilling Life.
Definitely THE END!
[1] Tanahashi, K. (2015) Zen Chants Thirty-Five Essential Texts with Commentary. Shambhala: Boston and London
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