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Posts Tagged ‘Pema Chodron’

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Pema Chodron in her book Awakening Loving-Kindness wrote, “The point is not to try to change ourselves.  Meditation practice isn’t about trying to throw ourselves away and become something better.  It’s about befriending who we are already (page 3).[1] Often times I find myself not being very kind to myself, questioning my abilities, my finances, my friends or lack thereof, and I could go on and on.  But of what value is that and what peace derives from it?

There is a situation going on in our neighborhood where many are trying to harm others because of their loneliness and personal pain for which they have no answer or insight. They are sad and mad and lonely and have lost all connection with peace, love, and compassion.  They feel if they put you down and make you feel as lonely and helpless as they do it will make them feel better, or more in control, or righteous.  Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to work and thus they end up on the merry-go-round whirling through a lonely and desperate life with no way out.

I am a Zen Buddhist priest and thus I find solace in the teachings of the Buddha as Pema Chodron writes, “Gentleness is a sense of goodheartedness toward ourselves (page 5).”[2]  When we practice this principle, we enter into an awareness of peace that is in us and has always been in us even when we thought otherwise.  Our world is enmeshed in fear and hate and pain but the solution is not out there in others.  The solution lies within me in my heart, my words, and my deeds.  Until I recognize and become aware of who I really am I too will be led by my fears and anxieties and not my joys, and passions, and love.

She goes on to write, “Basically, making friends with yourself is making friends with all those people too, because when you come to have this kind of honesty, gentleness, and goodheartedness, combined with clarity about yourself there’s no obstacle to feeling loving-kindness for others as well (page 6).[3]

Peace in the world begins with me right here right now with who I am not with who I wish I was. I hope you’ll join me in this awareness of being who you really are…loving-kindness itself.

[1] P. Chodron (1996) Awakening Loving-Kindness Shambhala Publications: Boston & London
[2] Ibid.
[3] Ibid.

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“In The Wisdom of No Escape, Pema Chodron, one of the foremost American teachers of Tibetan Buddhism, writes…Meditation practice isn’t about trying to throw ourselves away and become something better. It’s about befriending who we are already (page 67-8).[1]

When I write about the MASCC in teaching one of the letters stands for mindfulness/meditation.  It is ironic that although we sit frequently in order to be different, to change who we think we are, or to find our “higher” self, or achieve enlightenment it is a false assumption.  We are already each of those things without spending one minute on the “cushion” as they say in Zen Buddhism.

It is about “befriending who you  are, loving ourselves with all the patience we can muster, with all the love we can imagine, and with no criticism.  We sit simply to sit.  We quiet our minds simply to help shut down the chatter of the “monkeys” as we talked about before.  When we do that the rest comes naturally.  The divine being that we are simply shows up.  Our words become kinder and gentler, our compassion grows for all people and things, and we begin to live a life of peace, love, and compassion.

We don’t have to “throw ourselves” away because the parts of us that are hindering us in life will quietly leave and go bother someone else!  We will suddenly be living in a kinder gentler world.

So when you offer your students a few moments in each class to simply do that 60 second 3 Breath Exercise I wrote about before you are helping them discover their true self, to expand their self-esteem, to believe in themselves, and to know that with time, effort, and love, they can succeed at any goal that they genuinely want to attain.

If you are working with children and using the 3 Breath Exercise you might want to take another tip from Susan Greenland from her Mindful Games book.  She gives us two great tips.

  1. Lying down is often children’s favorite meditation posture, but Mindful Breathing can also be practiced sitting or standing.

  2. “If it’s difficult for kids to stay still when they practice Mindful Breathing while sitting or standing, they often find it helpful to sway from side to side slowly and with control (page 70). [2]

You may not be a teacher or a kid but if you too feel sitting practice is difficult try her other two techniques and let me know how it goes!  Wear your MASCC every day and watch what happens!

In gassho,

Shokai

 

[1] Greenland, S. K. (2016) Mindful Games. Shambhala: Boulder, CO.

[2] Ibid.

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