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Posts Tagged ‘detachment’

Philosophers throughout time have tried to describe, discover, and analyze the “self.”  Buddhists are no different.  From the moment the Buddha began his journey toward his awakening until today we are still writing and thinking and talking about this thing we call the “self.”

Sensei Kaz TanahashiKaz Tanahashi writes about it so clearly. What an “original face” he has! Filled with joy for sure!

“A further irony is that only when a person is completely detached from himself does he find himself and realize what is common to himself and others, ‘self’ immediately opens into selflessness.  This selflessness is called ‘true self’ or ‘original face.’  It is also described as ‘something close’ or ‘what is intimate (page 17).’[1]

We talk to ourselves often and I wonder sometimes when I catch myself doing it who the heck am I talking to? Am I having a conversation with my higher self, my lower self, my giving and kind self or my grouchy and self-centered self? How can I have so many selves!? What face am I showing to others?

Which self is the real me?  You must discover that for yourself!  Yikes are you kidding?! Buddhists have been debating this forever, or so it seems.  So what do you think?  How do people see you?  What self do you show to others?  Do you pick and chose and show one self at work, one self at home, one self on the golf course, and yet another in the zendo, mosque, church or synagogue?

Do you have a list of attributes that you hold dear and hope that in even the most confusing or frightening moments that self will appear just when you need it?  Can you change yourself?  Or do you believe that it’s all baked in and are using the excuse: “That’s just the way I am! I’ve always been that way and I’m too old to change now!”

If that self is hindering you and harming others do you think you can change that idea of “self?”  Are you willing and able to look at yourself honestly and find those things that are harming you and others and change that part of yourself to someone that no longer desires to live a negative harmful life.  You can, if you want to. Why not become that loving, peaceful, compassionate, friendly, and most of all fun person to be around! It’s all up to you!  Your family and friends and your pets will be glad you are finally showing your “original face!”

 

[1] Tanahashi, K. (1985) Moon in a Dewdrop Writings of Zen Master Dogen North Point Press: New York

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Landscapes of Wonder book coverIn his chapter titled “Earth Tones” Bhikkhu Nyanasobhano talks about mindfulness and detachment and how they are like two sides of the same coin.

Observing the world and its changes mindfully, with detachment leads to disenchantment and peace and eventually liberation from suffering—Nibbana.  In order to restrain the reflex of greed it is important to try to stop looking at things crudely as potential enjoyments, and to see them more as means for understanding.  As long as we unthinkingly surrender to objects the power to infatuate or distract us or to force us into rash action, we live in peril, because of their inherent instability; but if we view with detachment both the repulsive and the love, if we see things exactly as they are and not as we would like them to be, then we can live safely and independently (page 64-65). [1]

When we become attached in this way what happens is the person, thing, object, or the words control us, have power over us, and thus can make our lives cold, bitter, sad, and lost. And yes, they can make us happy and feel loved, and worthwhile.  Regardless of whether we perceive these as good or bad just the naming of them tethers us to them through our thinking and our emotions. We are ultimately controlled by them.  To be free we want to be detached from them.  It is okay to observe them, recognize them, acknowledge them, and then let them go.  Detach them—see them floating away like a helium balloon.

Just this! Just this moment in time.  If the words are true of you it might be a good thing to say maybe I could have been nicer, or kinder, or more empathetic and then make a plan to do better the next time.  Then drop it!  Don’t be attached to the negative thoughts, the previous actions, or deeds.  Don’t ruminate over the past since you can’t go back and you can’t change the past!  The best thing to do is remove your attachment and move forward toward the good.

Avoid allowing others to control you by what they think, say, and feel about you.  Detach yourself from the objects you precede with the words “must have” in your life. Those are things that you have convinced yourself make you part of the team/crowd or worthy of someone’s attention or love. You were born divine and perfect regardless of how you feel today and regardless of what “they” think or say about you.  Detach yourself from their words and the names that they call you good, bad, or indifferent.

Simply observe the world without attachment. Make any changes you think are necessary.  Be the person your dog or cat things you are! Nyanasobhano says, “To be free of the tyranny of the senses—including the mind-sense—is to walk with mindfulness in the present moment, to think, act, and feel without distortion, to be unruffled and capable (page 65).” [2]  This is the person that you really are! Now act like it!

 

[1] Nyanasobhano, B. (1998) Landscapes of wonder Discovering Buddhist Dhamma in the world around us. Somerville Massachusetts: Wisdom Publications

[2] Ibid.

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