When we really look at our lives and the ruts that we have created for ourselves we may wonder—how the heck did I get here? When practicing meditation and/or mindfulness we want to be nonjudgmental and simply observe the “stuckness” and then decide either to stay stuck or get unstuck! The choice is always up to us!
Does it really matter “how” we got stuck? Or is it more important to review the situation and decide if it is worth my time and energy to get unstuck. Will getting unstuck help me in a positive way. Will it help me get my homework assignments completed for school? Will it help me get the chores done around the house or the projects completed at work? Will it help me improve my health or income or relationships?
I love what Russell Simmons wrote in his new book Success through Stillness in his chapter “Getting Unstuck.” “…no matter where you’re from or what you’ve done, you’re never stuck in anything unless you say you are (page 143).”
Many years ago I learned about the Theory of 21. This theory purports that it takes 21 days to create a new habit or get unstuck! So that means once you’ve observed your “stuckness” evaluated its impact on your life and then decided it was something you’d like to see change—getting unstuck will take at least 21 days. For me it usually takes much longer than that! When I get stuck I really get stuck!
Whether you’re stuck in a bad relationship, habit, thought pattern, job, school, or work…you can get unstuck. Below are some simple steps for getting there!
1. Make up your mind that YOU want to get unstuck, not your mother, father, girlfriend, boyfriend, or boss—You want to do it.
2. Identify what triggers you about this “stuckness.” So if you’re stuck on procrastinating on homework, work projects, doing the laundry, or cleaning the house it’s probably because these things are too big and are overwhelming you when you see them or even think about them.
3. To fix it break this “stuckness” down in to bite size pieces. How do you eat an elephant—one bite at a time!
4. Meditate on one of those pieces each day and allow the unconscious mind to bubble up the things that are holding you back from getting unstuck. As they come to mind take the energy out of them and see them being done with ease, floating away like a hot air balloon. Take the emotion out of the picture and change the picture from one of fear, anxiety, or pain to one of completion, peace, joy, forgiveness, love, and release. Do not give it any power. Simply observe and let it go again and again till the energy in it has dissipated! Remember things are “just this” in Buddhism and it is only our thoughts that give them power over us in both negative and positive ways.
5. Finally, just do it! Like the Niki commercial says. Do it every day until you’re unstuck and can move on with your new life—just this!
Just sit each morning in meditation. Then while doing the thing, if the emotions or thoughts begin to take you back to the “stuckness” take a quick moment to breath into it, fill it with air, smile, and let it go. Remember what Russell Simmons said, “you’re never stuck in anything unless you say you are.” The choice is up to you! Meditation and mindfulness are the simple glue removers!
 Simmons, R. (2014) Success through Stillness Meditation made Simple. Penguin Group: NY, NY
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