Dr. Jan Chozen Bays in her wonderful book How to Train A Wild Elephant & Other Adventures in Mindfulness (2011, page 219) has an exercise entitled “Leave Things Better than You Found Them.” I have used this exercise now for over six months and I love it! Although she is referring to things like dirty dishes in the sink, laundry on the floor, or the garbage not emptied it came to me that we should do this everywhere we go and with everything in life. Dr. Bays’ writes, “In Zen paintings turtles symbolize this practice of leaving no traces, because they sweep the sand with their tails as they creep along, wiping out their footprints (page 22).”
I began my relationship with this mindfulness challenge by going to my clipart and getting two cute cartoon pictures of turtles and above the top picture I wrote “Leave No Trace!” and above the other picture below it I wrote “Leave it Better Then You Found it!” I put it on my refrigerator and so that worked for a while, but after a while we don’t even notice what is on our fridge! So, I recently moved it and tapped it to the cabinet above my kitchen sink so I can see it every time I use it. Next, I am going to move it to the bathroom, and so on until I have created a better place in each and every room.
Can you imagine what our schools, classrooms, homes, neighborhoods, and cities would look like if everyone had this attitude? If when you saw some garbage on the sidewalk you picked it up and put it in the trash. Or if you noticed that a neighbor’s yard needed a little pick-me-up and took a few hours on the weekend to help him or her out with your children and with some friends or neighbors at hand. Many hands make light work my mom used to say.
Dr. Bays goes on to write, “One person extended the scope of this task from material things to people. She did this by asking ‘How can I leave this relationship better than it has been (page 220-21)?’” I wonder what kind of relationship the young woman was talking about. Was it just family and friends? What if she had seen a complete stranger—would that person be included in her idea as well?
If you saw a person who looked confused or lost what would you do? Just today a friend of mine helped out a complete stranger. He saw this elderly gentleman who was having trouble putting self-service gas in his car and he left him better then he found him. Once the gentlemen was helped into the store and paid for the gas my friend showed him how to pump the gas and when he was finished off the gentleman went to run his errand. As I watched I wondered where he was off to: maybe to the grocery store to get his lovely elderly wife her favorite butter pecan ice cream. One never knows, does one?
Could these relationships that we need to leave better than we found them be our teacher/student relationships, or our boss/employee relationships or employee/boss relationships? How about our parent/child relationships or sibling relationships? Maybe even your BFF, or the person you are dating, or the person you are in love with? Could those relationships be with things other than people such as our planet, our environment, and all the animals that inhabit this planet with us? Shouldn’t we leave everything better than when we found it? I think so.
If you are willing to try this experiment with me please let me know. How long will you commit to the project: A month, six months, a year…how about a life time? You never know how long that can be and what you can accomplish! So let’s get going. Let’s all take the time to “leave things better than we found them.”
Of course, Jesus had the original thought along these lines: “Treat people the same way you want them to treat you” (recorded in the Bible, in Matthew 7:12). I think that His words pair well with the words, “Leave things better than you found them.” Yes, the world WOULD BE a better place! I seem to always think along these lines when I am in a public restroom. I see the used paper towels tossed on the floor and the counter all wet with splashed water. Therefore, I pick up and wipe up after others so that the next person doesn’t have to encounter a mess. Just wish someone BEFORE ME would do the same! It’s the RIGHT thing to do.
Linda, I am right there with you and my mom is the greatest example she picks everything up on the department store floor, it takes us forever to shop! Could be she is retired from JC Penney! Thanks for commenting and I am glad you enjoyed the blog. Kathy
I tbelieve that this is the message Jesus tried to convey in it’s simplest and most pragmatic form- a message that surely is at the heart of all non cult religions- Christian, Eastern ,Jewish Native American and so on.
Al, You are absolutely right. That is what is so confusing about religions fighting with each other since their core messages are all the same, peace, love, and compassion. Thanks for the comment and for reading my blog. Kathy
We receive as we give, the Karma thing. Perhaps leaving better than found applies to people as well as situations. We will get us better results from those with whom we interact if we give more than expected – leaving better. However, leaving better may mean installing boundaries also. To leave better without personal boundaries in place can lead to the continuation of not being respected. How can we improve anything, either ourselves or others, if there is no standard?
Arnold, I still think we can maintain boundaries and still it better than we found it. By using my favorite Catherine Ponder affirmation, “Bless them on their way to find their highest good else.” And that could be out of our lives. KB